Do you have that one story just randomly shared over a casual afternoon chitchat with friends or family, that hit you so hard, it changed the way you saw things?
Mine came from my sister.
We were just casually talking when she shared the story of the founder of the company she works for. This woman had spent years doing volunteer work, all while slowly working her way toward a master’s degree in psychology. And now, she’s built something deeply personal. A center that offers psychological support to people who need it the most. Thousands have already been helped. Thousands, finding healing, because one woman chose purpose over certainty.
And I remember thinking… Why?
Why not go for a big company that would pay her well? Why not take the safer route, the one paved with titles, better pay, and more structure? Why risk everything on something she wasn’t even sure would work especially when she had little to no experience in business?
And then it hit me.
She’s doing it because her purpose is bigger than any paycheck.
I want to stop working for people who see me as nothing more than a tool to reach their own goals. I don’t want to play that part anymore. I’m tired. I’m exhausted. And honestly? I feel like I want to vomit this life I’ve been living in.
That thought spiraled into something deeper… It made me ask: What would my 80-year-old self say to me now? Maybe she’s lying in a bed, frail and fading, if I’m lucky enough to reach that age. And what would she say to this 40-something version of me?
She’d probably scream: “F*CK YOU, JOY!” “You lazy, fat asshole! Look at us—we couldn’t even afford diapers. We’re leaving this world with nothing in our name. No one even knows who we are. We wasted it.”
That’s the fear that gut-punched me. But maybe that fear is a gift. A brutal wake-up call. Because deep down, I know I can rewrite the story starting now.
The Question That Haunts Me
It made me ask: Why are we raised to chase jobs, but not purpose?
Why do we spend so much time learning how to fit in, but barely any time learning how to build?
I know, not everyone is a leader or a visionary. Some people are truly amazing in supporting roles, and I believe that’s okay. We all play a role in this world. Not everyone has to start a movement or launch a company. But I imagine those who feel a quiet pull to share something… to create something of their own… those who can’t shake off the feeling that they’re meant to build, lead, or speak up.
They deserve to hear that it’s allowed.
I think of fresh graduates today so full of fire, but immediately trained to look for a job instead of asking, What can I create? What can I contribute, not just to a company, but to the world?
Some of them are born to lead. To start something. To make waves. But no one tells them that’s allowed. We teach kids to believe in job security—not in themselves.
And I say this with love, because I am that girl, chasing job titles just to feel seen. Proving my worth with every new role, even when deep down, something didn’t feel right. I kept going, thinking maybe the next position, the next recognition, would finally make me feel fulfilled.
Until I heard that story.
It cracked something open in me. It made me pause and ask: Am I really living for myself? Or am I still trying to prove something to people who aren’t even watching anymore?
Maybe It’s Time
But maybe… just maybe, it’s time to stop waiting for someone to hand us a seat at their table, and start building our own.
I think it’s time I choose purpose over job security. I think it’s time I truly believe in myself, what I’m capable of and what I can bring into the world, if not the world, at least for some people.
So I ask you, whether you’re a fresh grad, a tired professional, or a mom like me who’s just trying to make sense of it all:
Are you building a life that reflects who you truly are?
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